Whether you have been married for many years or a short time, your partner is your lover. As your love grows for each other, that loving will blossom in how it is shown. Treat that person with gentleness and God-given wisdom, and you will have a wonderful marriage to look forward to each day and year of your lives together.

Don’t be in a hurry when you are together, whether you during intimacy or taking a walk. God created us to enjoy each other. Your relationship will blossom as you learn take your time because you are concentrating on making the other person happy rather than watching the clock or making sure your own needs are met.

When you have a need in your life, you can go to the person you married and share with them, then pray about it together. That is how my wife, Cheri, and I began our relationship on a Christian dating site. Later, it blossomed into romance and then marriage. Make a time, both morning and evening to pray and share with each other from your hearts.

When you first met that person you married it probably began as friendship. As your love for each other grows, so should your friendship. Is this a hard concept to grasp, that your mate should be your best friend? He or she should be the first person you turn to in a crisis--after God. If you have nurtured and built your relationship in a Godly way, then this should be true of your marriage.

God didn’t design marriage to be one-sided. It is to be an equal partnership that honors and glorifies God in every facet. Disrespect or controlling of one's partner are not fruits of the Holy Spirit, but fruits of the world. The Bible says that we are to love, honor, and respect the one God gave us. Each partner brings certain gifts to the marriage that can be utilized and appreciated. So use them to help your relationship rather than letting them become a point of contention or disharmony.

When it is appropriate use “please” and “thank you” and other terms of courtesy. Just because you are married to your spouse does not mean you have to treat them with less respect than others. As Christians, the way we treat each other in public and otherwise is a portion of our witness. This also includes the way you speak to your mate through your tone of voice. For instance, do you use a condescending or complaining tone when you talk to your partner or ask a question? What is your normal tone of voice? Angry? Irritated? Indifferent? Loving? How you are perceived has a lot to do with your mood and tone of voice.

Keeping the confidence of your mate is very important. Sometimes we see this happen in the ministry when a pastor may use his family as illustrations for his sermons. This generates stress and embarrassment in a relationship not only with your spouse but your children as well. What is said between a couple should be kept between the couple unless it is mutually agreed upon to say something to others.

Whatever we undertake to do in life requires time to learn how to do it: sports, career, hobbies, and even relationships. It is a life-long process to learn how to love and communicate with the person you chose to spend your life with.

Count it as an investment in your future together as you spend time together. Learn to enjoy each other’s presence and appreciate what God has given you. With our schedules filling up, we have to make time for each other or the relationship will fall apart from lack of interest.

Proverbs 3:5-6 tells us: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.”(NLT) We can depend on God to give us the wisdom we need in our relationships and every other area of our lives. He created them, and loves it when we ask for his wisdom.